..

I know I am at fault and partly responsible, but I don't think I deserve to be treated this way.

...

if you want to stir people, then you should be prepared to be stirred too.
When you stir people, you think it's fun, but when people stir you, you get angry?
Grow up la.

...

i will not be careless.
i will not be over-confident.
i will not screw up.

..

aw seriously. screw devpsyc.

F UP

ARGHHHH

=.=

Why do my words always end up sounding different from what I intended to convey...

=(

I can be so insensitive sometimes.
I took my joke too far, but there was really no malicious intent.

I'm sorry.

=)

its nice to have someone show you concern for a change.

be true to myself

Be true to myself. That's what I shall strive to be this year.

I hope to be able to look back upon 2013 and say that I have done all the things that I wanted to do.
So what if people doubts or questions me? It doesn't matter, as long as I know that I'm doing what is right.

reflections

I think being around kind people has made me learn empathy.
It's not that I'm lacking empathy to begin with, but I guess I just never really bothered to try to make a difference in someone's life.

I shall try now though. To be honest, it's not that hard.
Saying thank you to the cleaners when they happen to be sweeping an area near to you, giving them and the security guards drinks that was left over from a party.

They aren't big differences, but we don't always need to have extravagant gestures to make a difference.

I learnt today from a friend, that she volunteers to be a teaching assistant at an autistic school.
That kinda struck a chord with me. I mean, she's studying full-time like me, but she still manages to go for CCAs and even volunteer her time to help out. It made me wonder, about how can some people be so benevolent. I'm full of admiration and respect for her and I guess it also made me reflect upon myself for awhile.

Maybe I should be trying to make a difference too. I always said that I'm not cut out for counseling and early childhood or special needs childhood jobs. But then maybe I was wrong. It feels really good to be able to make a difference in someone else life, however small the difference may be. Maybe I should try out such jobs, and I would find out that I like the job.

fleeting thoughts

Studying ain't everything, and there's definitely more important things in life to strive and live for.
But for now, I cannot see anything else for me to strive and live for, except my studies.
I love what I'm studying now.
Across my many years of education, I did not thoroughly enjoy what I was studying until I start university education. Maths was fun, but psychology and sociology are just so much better.

not this sem

my gpa will not drop.
not this sem.

I will not fall behind in my readings.
Push on bob.

=(

I really suck at interpreting relationships...
Is it really complicated, or am I making things look complicated.

I used to believe in platonic relationships.
It used to work. Really.

brother is home

Brother is finally home yesterday.

I guess I'm glad that he's home now.
He's been away for 6 months, during which I don't think I have really missed him alot.

The relationship between me and my brother is unique I would think.
We are not particularly close to each other.
If I could summarize, I would say our relationship is based primarily upon duty, rather than affection.

I have a duty to him as an older brother, and he has a duty to me as an younger brother.
Our relationship is best seen when my parents are away.
We don't really talk, even when our parents are away. But during this time, he would account his whereabouts to me, just because it's his responsibility to do so.

Actually, I'm quite thankful that he is back now. At least now he can deal with my father.
We don't have to be faced with the awkward silence at home now that he is home.
At the very least, I know my brother will make concessions towards him, unlike me.

This CNY, I just hope for no family drama.
Please don't let us fight. Just don't bother me, leave me alone.

家

家家有本难念的经
Under the surface, even the happiest families have problems.

crush-ed

been awhile since i had a crush.
4 years?

My lack of a social life is quite depressing.